Celebrating two years of raw conciousness...

I'm back in action. We left Connecticut last Monday at 10 am. and almost immediately stopped to a dead halt in NYC on the delightful (not) Cross-Bronx expressway for two hours because an oil truck spilled its cargo all the way across I-95... Lincoln had a meltdown in the backseat because he didn't want to pee in a bottle, not that I would have either, but he finally did and then settled down and we were moving southward once again a short while later. That night we stopped at a Hampton Inn in Selma, NC at around midnight after 14 hours in the car. We specifically stopped at the Hampton Inn because on their advertisements they state that they have very comfortable beds with cotton linens and lovely cotton duvet covers. I really dislike synthetic fibers anywhere near my skin and especially cannot abide those plasticized motel blankets... So the Hampton Inn lies! Their beds and linens are not any more comfortable than any other crappy hotel I have ever stayed in! Just FYI... The next morning we were up and ready to go at about 8 am. and decided to hit the hotel breakfast bar before we started driving. So bagels, cream cheese, pasteurized OJ, and tea with half and half later we hit the road. I knew that it wasn't ideal to eat that food but figured that I wouldn't be such a big deal. I started to get anxious about 4 hours later and we had barely even hit South Carolina, by Georgia me and Felix were arguing, and after a Subway sandwich in north Florida (veggie on whole wheat with pepperjack cheese and mayo) I was crying, nearly hysterical and downright miserable... We finally made it home at 10:30 pm on Tuesday night. I drove the whole way. The first thing I did when we got home was clean the refrigerator from top to bottom, inside and out, sterilization style. Then I plugged it an and nothing... It was dead. We ended up at the pancake house, you know, the international one, at about 1 am eating nasty omelets while Felix and I had a "serious discussion about the future of our relationship"... The next morning I went to two home depots and the Habitat for Humanity Re-Store and finally bought a fridge, on credit..., and drove it home myself in the giant rented home depot truck... I then proceeded to go grocery shopping at two stores braving the day before Thanksgiving crowds. Unbelievably, I felt pretty good. I put all the groceries away and went to sleep. The next day, Thanksgiving day, was a nightmare and is now sort of a disgusting blur. I was totally exhausted, the house was still not all cleaned up and I had dinner to make, a cooked vegan dinner. I do not know why I didn't just give up and go to bed. Me and Felix fought all day and then made up and then finally ate dinner at 6 pm. I didn't even eat very much although it tasted great if I do say so myself. By 10 pm I was in the throes of such stomach pains and gastric distress that I cannot even think of it without breaking out in a sweat. The sickness lasted until Sunday, yesterday morning. Then, last night Lincoln started throwing up at 11 pm and didn't stop until 6 this morning. We had to clean the path from his bed to the bathroom about 4 times and I am still doing all the laundry. So needless to say we are wiped out and a little more than exhausted. So if you were wondering where I have been, now you know. I hope you all had a great Thanksgiving the moral of the story is- Never go on a road trip without a cooler full of enough delicious raw food to last the entire trip and then some. I wouldn't wish my experience on my worst enemy. I'll be back tomorrow, hopefully well rested and maybe even back to my usually optimistic and happy self. After all, the sun is shining, it is 80 degrees, and we have coconuts and plenty of papayas growing in the jungle formerly known as our back yard garden... Peace y'all and one love.

Indian food escapade...

My pants are definitely getting looser. So I am feeling good about that. I have been running all over the place getting things done before we head back to Florida. I am going to be so happy to have some coconuts and oranges, and sunlight, of course. The Indian food got a hold of me tonight... It didn't taste too good though and I didn't eat too much of it. I definitely don't feel the need to eat any more cooked stuff either after I had the Indian food. So the key will be to get right back to the raw love ASAP.

Today I ingested:
32 oz. green lemonade!
lemon herb tea w/ stevia
small piece dark chocolate
mango/cherry/cashew mylkshake... YUM!!!
rooibos tea with raw honey and fresh raw almond milk
warm miso broth with mushrooms and baby arugula (much tastier than the Indian food that followed it)
normal sized plate of Indian takeout... (didn't taste as good as I expected- Thank Goddess!!!)

Still on the salads...

Today I ate/ingested:
2 cups of chocolate chai tea with raw honey and fresh almond milk
about half of a perfect pineapple
mixed baby herbs and greens with an avocado, mushrooms and sweet mustard dressing
almond butter, cacao, and maca mylkshake
another of the same salad I had earlier
1 Tbsp. of coconut butter

I am very happy that I am still loving the salads and actually enjoyed two of them today. I also was craving a vegetable juice but was too lazy to bother making it. I had a hard day today emotionally but I am starting to feel better now. We are leaving to go home to Florida on Monday morning so I am really busy getting packed up and ready to go. I am very grateful that we will be back in the sunshine before Thanksgiving.

Dehydrator Drama, Butter Lettuce, and Labradorite...

So, I have a confession to make. I don't really like salad... I know, I know, such blasphemy from the mouth of an aspiring raw fooder. But, I just don't usually like it, until tonight that is. I have discovered butter lettuce. It is so delicious. I ate two darling heads of the hydroponic delicacy and loved every bite. What a breakthrough for me. I really, really liked it. I didn't eyeball Felix and Linc's tofu and soba noodle stir fry with even the slightest touch of jealousy. It is practically a miracle. I just ate my butter lettuce with some delicious sweet mustard dressing and drank my vegetable juice, happy as could be. Thank you Universe.

I don't think I like dehydrated food, except red pepper flax crackers. I don't even like the smell of the dehydrator while it is running, and yes it is clean! I couldn't even face the stuff that I made in it yesterday. It just doesn't appeal to me. I have been this way since I got the thing and I know it is just me because everyone else seems to love all the stuff I make in it, even my SAD friends... I also think I have gone off cashews, again. They just don't taste that good anymore. Well, except when you make them into raw cheesecake, which I intend to do tomorrow. I have this whole freezerful of nuts and seeds and I couldn't care less about them. I even went to the health food store today after my meditation with my friend Barbara at her healing arts office and ended up buying dried veggie snacks and dried bananas because the thought of eating the nuts in a Lara bar totally turned me off. I don't even know if the things that I got were "really raw" or not but they were the only non-nut rawish snack in the whole health food store! Get with the program, local health food store! I really would rather buy my stuff from the neighborhood HFS and not drive all the way to Providence, RI to Whole Foods, but when practically all the local place sells is supplements, health and beauty aids, and organic meat, it kind of leaves me no choice!

I got a new bracelet today from my favorite jewelry store. It is labradorite and I love it. I am very particular about my jewelry and I think my taste in it is different from most people. I like more rustic, artsy pieces not fancy kinds of stuff. I always pick out the weird pieces that no one else buys, but then everyone always comments on my jewelry and asks where I got it... Anyhow, I just learned that Labradorite is a power stone, allowing you to see through illusions and determine the actual form of your dreams and goals. It is excellent for strengthening intuitions.

Use labradorite to:

Stimulate imagination
Develop enthusiasm and thus, new ideas
To see more clearly in meditation

And also: Labradorite is an excellent gemstone for those seeking to lose weight as it balances and regulates metabolism.

Well imagine that! Love and blessings to you all and sweet dreams too!

Cooked food- too much is never enough...

So I was doing the "raw til dinner thing" and it was cool for the first few days and then- Whammo!- back to the full blown cooked food binging... Ah well... At least we can live and learn. So I am back to all raw and feeling better. I have decided to "just say no" to the scale and just eat raw. My focus is eat raw for health, spirituality, vitality, and freedom from food addictions. My goal is to see how much healthier I can be at the end of one year. I have also come around to the fact that I absolutely must be prepared with delicious raw food at all times because when I am I don't even miss the cooked stuff. So today I packed the dehydrator with almond bread, onion crackers, marinated veggies for "fajitas" and I also made some raw oatmeal, and cashew sour cream. Tomorrow the dehydrating will continue with tomato-pepper flax crackers, cinnamon rolls, stuffed mushrooms and maybe some kind of tart or cheesecake or something.

Today I ate:
mango and strawberry smoothie
raw cinnamon apple oatmeal (Ani Phyo's recipe- delicious)
bowl of creamy corn chowder
a couple of spoonfuls of coconut butter (not oil)
piece of almond bread with cashew cream and marinated veggies
2 cacao truffles

I also had two cups of chai with cooked almond milk and maple syrup, but I really enjoy them so I'm not going to worry 'bout it... I'm making some fresh almond milk to have with it tomorrow along with some raw honey.

I am really looking forward to moving past the dieting mentality. You know, when you try to eat "perfectly" and as little as possible throughout the day in anticipation of weighing in the next morning and expecting to see some big loss on the scale. And then if it doesn't happen you get all depressed and say "Screw it! I'll just eat whatever I want today and start over tomorrow". Or am I the only one who does this? I am so ready to bag that whole deal... I have such a beautiful picture of myself and my life as a raw fooder in my imagination and the aforementioned dumb dieting behavior just doesn't fit into the new vision I have of myself. Besides the whole dieting drama mentality is so torturous and doesn't work anyway. I'm just gonna love myself the best way I know how from here on out. No more short and long term body goals, no more I will only eat fruit until I lose 20 lbs., and absolutely no more lying to myself out of self loathing and desperation. I (finally) love myself too much to accept that kind of crap from myself any longer. And if I slip up, or stumble, or face challenges and don't prevail, I'll just keep on loving myself and my dutiful, darling, dependable body because that is what feels the best to me now. And I am so glad about that.

Natalia Rose's "Raw Food Detox Diet"

So I have just re-read Natalia Rose's "Raw Food Detox Diet" and I am in love... I highly recommend it to new raw fooders, people who love to cook but want to be raw, and those who have been struggling with staying "all raw". I am experimenting with her gradual approach to detox and am finding that my food "issues" are less present, I feel more centered, and I am losing weight. She is also a big advocate of food combining and I am enjoying learning about it.

Felix and I are both feeling better since the liver cleanse. The biggest difference is that we are both less cranky and we are sleeping better.

I am still loving the cacao. Wow! That stuff is powerful. I make fresh almond milk and blend it with dates, maca, cacao powder, a pinch of salt, some vanilla, and some ice and -holy cow- that is some good stuff. I have been having it for lunch with a salad. For breakfast I have green lemonade and then some fruits through out the rest of the morning. And then in the afternoon I have green lemonade again. And then I have a properly combined dinner. No sweat. Everyone is happy. 'Nuff said...

Liver Cleanse- completed!

Well, I will never say that it was the most enjoyable of processes... The liver cleanse that we did last night comes from here... It is called the Are You Stoned? Liver cleanse and if you check it out from the link above you will notice the large, orange warning box... Well, I ignored the warning and we went for it. This cleanse calls for drinking 2 cups of olive oil and 1 cup of lemon juice. So, needless to say, that was just gross, but the reason that I chose this particular cleanse was because it didn't involve drinking any Epsom salts, which I think would be even grosser. So we juice fasted all day yesterday and after noon the day before. Then last night we started drinking the oil mixture at about 7:30 pm and continued drinking a portion ever 15 minutes until it was all gone. I am very surprised that I didn't vomit and Felix saved all of his vomiting until this morning... When we were done drinking the concoction we went to bed and lie down on our right sides and tried to sleep. It wasn't painful at all, just very unsettling. I was anxious and a little angry, which didn't really surprise me because the liver is associated with feelings of anger. I didn't sleep very well and then we both started to "use the toilet" at about 3 am and continued until about 10 am this morning. Felix got out about 2/3 cup of deep green stones and I just got green sludge... The smell of what came out of us was the grossest part... I'm not proud that such a rank, foul vapor came out of me. I feel okay this morning and Felix went back bed after showering and vomiting... I have very little appetite and we have just had some green juice and some almond milk with the pulp left in. It was quite an experience and I do feel that it was quite effective, pretty yucky but effective. Here is a picture of Felix's gallstones, nasty little things that they are... Bless him, my lovely husband who does all of these weird health related things with me. What a lovely partner I have.

Here are a few inspiring quotes from two of my favorite people:

"I am in favor of animal rights as well as human rights. That is the way of a whole human being."
Abraham Lincoln, 16th U.S. President

"Non-violence leads to the highest ethics, which is the goal of all evolution. Until we stop harming all other living beings, we are still savages."
Thomas Edison, inventor

Liver cleanse today!

So for the past four days I have been eating cooked food... Uggghhhh... My body is so over cooked food. So here I am, recommitted to raw. And that is that. No matter how many times I go back and forth between cooked and raw, being a raw foodist is what I strive to be and what I know myself to be in my heart. I know I will succeed because I will never quit reaching to achieve this goal.

I had my gallbladder removed in 1997 when I was 21. It was an emergency surgery and I was very lucky to get to the hospital in time as the gallbladder ruptured during the operation. 21 years old is a very early age to have one's gallbladder out but at that time I was already 100 lbs. overweight, had been drinking/partying heavily for at least 3 years, and was eating a pint of Ben and Jerry's ice cream per day... Not a recipe for health by any standards. Having to have an important organ removed from my body at such a young age made an impact on me and I began to seriously investigate natural health and take my spirituality more seriously at that time. But, my addictions were strong and I tried and failed many, many times to overcome them. I am happy to report that I no longer drink any alcohol, eat any meat, do any drugs (prescription, over the counter, or recreational included), or smoke any cigarettes. I am basically vegan except for the occasional cheese or egg transgression, and only if I am having a binge. So that took me ten years to accomplish... But I have also left behind a wicked case of rosacea and adult acne, nightly insomnia, debilitating social anxiety, various toxic relationships, and very serious clinical depression/suicidal tendencies, just by changing my daily lifestyle choices. The health/lifestyle goals I still have left to accomplish are to have a daily yoga practice, have a daily meditation practice, be a consistent raw vegan and to detoxify off this 120 lbs. of remaining toxins from my body. What a long strange trip it's been, to say the least.

Yesterday, Felix and I decided that today is the day for the long awaited liver cleanse. I think I could definitely use it... Neither of us has ever done one before, though we have done the Blessed Herbs colon cleanse, a parasite cleanse, and a total body cleanse. So we are juice fasting today in preparation for the cleanse this evening and we ate very lightly yesterday. I'll post about our experiences with the cleanse tomorrow and maybe I'll even have a nice jar full of my very own gallstones to take a picture of and share with you all... How exciting is that?